Sermon on the Mount

Jesus the Son of Man

His words and His deeds as told and recorded by those who knew Him

by Khalil Gibran

(1928)

Chapter : Matthew - The Sermon on the Mount

ONE HARVEST DAY Jesus called us and His other friends to the hills. The earth was fragrant, and like the daughter of a king at her wedding-feast, she wore all her jewels. And the sky was her bridegroom.

When we reached the heights Jesus stood still in the grove of the laurels, and He said, "Rest here, quiet your mind and tune your heart, for I have much to tell you."

Then we reclined on the grass, and the summer flowers were all about us, and Jesus sat in our midst.

And Jesus said:

"Blessed are the serene in spirit.

"Blessed are they who are not held by possessions, for they shall be free.

"Blessed are they who remember their pain, and in their pain await their joy.

"Blessed are they who hunger after truth and beauty, for their hunger shall bring bread, and their thirst cool water.

"Blessed are the kindly, for they shall be consoled by their own kindliness.

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall be one with God.

"Blessed are the merciful, for mercy shall be in their portion.

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for their spirit shall dwell above the battle, and they shall turn the potter's field into a garden.

"Blessed are they who are hunted, for they shall be swift of foot and they shall be winged.

"Rejoice and be joyful, for you have found the kingdom of heaven within you. The singers of old were persecuted when they sang of that kingdom. You too shall be persecuted, and therein lies your honor, therein your reward.

"You are the salt of the earth; should the salt lose its savor wherewith shall the food of man's heart be salted?

"You are the light of the world. Put not that light under a bushel. Let it shine rather from the summit, to those who seek the City of God.

"Think not I came to destroy the laws of the scribes and the Pharisees; for my days among you are numbered and my words are counted, and I have but hours in which to fulfil another law and reveal a new covenant.

"You have been told that you shall not kill, but I say unto you, you shall not be angry without a cause.

"You have been charged by the ancients to bring your calf and your lamb and your dove to the temple, and to slay them upon the altar, that the nostrils of God may feed upon the odor of their fat, and that you may be forgiven your failings.

"But I say unto you, would you give God that which was His own from the beginning; and would you appease Him whose throne is above the silent deep and whose arms encircle space?

"Rather, seek out your brother and be reconciled unto him ere you seek the temple; and be a loving giver unto your neighbor. For in the soul of these God has builded a temple that shall not be destroyed, and in their heart He has raised an altar that shall never perish.

"You have been told, an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I say unto you: Resist not evil, for resistance is food unto evil and makes it strong. And only the weak would revenge themselves. The strong of soul forgive, and it is honor in the injured to forgive.

"Only the fruitful tree is shaken or stoned for food.

"Be not heedful of the morrow, but rather gaze upon today, for sufficient for today is the miracle thereof.

"Be not over-mindful of yourself when you give but be mindful of the necessity. For every giver himself receives from the Father, and that much more abundantly.

"And give to each according to his need; for the Father gives not salt to the thirsty, nor a stone to the hungry, nor milk to the weaned.

"And give not that which is holy to dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine. For with such gifts you mock them; and they also shall mock your gift, and in their hate would fain destroy you.

"Lay not up for yourselves treasures that corrupt or that thieves may steal away. Lay up rather treasure which shall not corrupt or be stolen, and whose loveliness increases when many eyes behold it. For where your treasure is, your heart is also.

"You have been told that the murderer shall be put to the sword, that the thief shall be crucified, and the harlot stoned. But I say unto you that you are not free from wrongdoing of the murderer and the thief and the harlot, and when they are punished in the body your own spirit is darkened.

"Verily no crime is committed by one man or one woman. All crimes are committed by all. And he who pays the penalty may be breaking a link in the chain that hangs upon your own ankles. Perhaps he is paying with his sorrow the price for your passing joy."

Thus spake Jesus, and it was in my desire to kneel down and worship Him, yet in my shyness I could not move nor speak a word.

But at last I spoke; and I said, "I would pray this moment, yet my tongue is heavy. Teach me to pray."

And Jesus said, "When you would pray, let your longing pronounce the words. It is in my longing now to pray thus:

"Our Father in earth and heaven, sacred is Thy name.
Thy will be done with us, even as in space.
Give us of Thy bread sufficient for the day.
In Thy compassion forgive us and enlarge us to forgive one another.
Guide us towards Thee and stretch down Thy hand to us in darkness.
For Thine is the kingdom, and in Thee is our power and our fulfillment."

And it was now evening, and Jesus walked down from the hills, and all of us followed Him. And as I followed I was repeating His prayer, and remembering all that He had said; for I knew that the words that had fallen like flakes that day must set and grow firm like crystals, and that wings that had fluttered above our heads were to beat the earth like iron hoofs.

The Secret

----- excerpted from 'The Secret' the best-selling book by Rhonda Byrne --------

The Secret Revealed

• The Great Secret of life is the law of attraction.
  
  
• The law of attraction says like attracts like, so when you think a thought, you are also attracting like thoughts to you.
  
  
• Thoughts are magnetic, and thoughts have a frequency. As you think thoughts, they are sent out into the Universe, and they magnetically attract all like things that are on the same frequency. Everything sent out returns to the source - you.
  
  
• You are like a human transmission tower, transmitting a frequency with your thoughts. If you want to change anything in your life, change the frequency by changing your thoughts.
  
  
• Your current thoughts are creating your future life. What you think about most or focus on the most will appear as your life.
  
  
• Your Thoughts become things.
  
  

The Secret made Simple

• The law of attraction is the law of nature. It is as impartial as the law of gravity.
  
  
Nothing can come into your experience unless you summon it through persistent thoughts.


To know what you're thinking, ask yourself how you are feeling. Emotions are valuable tools that instantly tell us what we are thinking.


• It is impossible to feel bad and at the same time have good thoughts.
  
  
• Your thoughts determine your frequency, and your feelings tell you immediately what frequency you are on. When you feel bad, you are on the frequency of drawing more bad things. When you feel good, you are powerfully attracting more good things to you.
  
  
• Secret Shifters, such as pleasant memories, nature, or your favourite music, can change your feelings and shift your frequency in an instant.
  
  
• The feeling of love is the highest frequency you can emit. The greater the love you feel and emit, the greater the power you are harnessing.
  
  

How to use the Secret

• Like Aladdin's Genie, the law of attraction grants our every command.


• The Creative Process helps you create what you want in three simple steps: ask, believe and receive.


• Asking the Universe for what you want is your opportunity to get clear about what you want. As you get clear in your mind, you have asked.


• Believing involves acting, speaking and thinking as though you have already received what you've asked for. When you emit the frequency of having received it, the law of attraction moves people, events and circumstances for you to receive.


• Receiving involves feeling the way you will feel once your desire has manifested. Feeling good now puts you on the frequency of what you want.


• To lose weight, don't focus on "losing weight". Instead, focus on your perfect weight. Feel the feelings of your perfect weight, and you will summon it to you.


• It takes no time for the Universe to manifest what you want. It is as easy to manifest one dollar as it is to manifest one million dollars.


• Starting with something small, like a cup of coffee or parking spaces, is an easy way to experience the law of attraction in action. Powerfully intend to attract something small. As you experience the power you have to attract, you will move on to creating much bigger things.


• Create your day in advance by thinking the way you want it to go, and you will create your life intentionally.
  
  

Powerful Processes Summaries

Expectation is a powerful attractive force. Expect the things you want, and don’t expect the things you don't want.


Gratitude is a powerful process for shifting your energy and bringing more of what you want into your life. Be grateful for what you already have, and you will attract more good things.


Giving thanks for what you want in advance turbo-charges your desires and sends a more powerful signal out into the Universe.


• Visualisation is the process of creating pictures in your mind of yourself enjoying what you want. When you visualise, you generate powerful thoughts and feelings of having it now. The law of attraction then returns that reality to you, just as you saw it in your mind.
  
  
• To use the law of attraction to your advantage, make it a habitual way of being, not just a one-time event.
  
  
At the end of every day, before you go to sleep, go back through the events of the day. Any events of moments that were not what you wanted, replay them in your mind the way you wanted them to go.

The Secret to Relationships

• When you want to attract a relationship, make sure your thoughts, words, actions, and surroundings do not contradict your desires.
  
  
• Your job is you. Unless you fill yourself up first, you have nothing to give anybody.
  
  
• Treat yourself with love and respect, and you will attract people who show love and respect.
  
  
• When you feel bad about yourself, you block the love and instead you attract more people and situations that will continue to make you feel bad about you.
  
  
• Focus on the qualities you love about yourself and the law of attraction will show you more great things about you.
  
  
• To make a relationship work, focus on what you appreciate about the other person, and not your complaints. When you focus on the strengths, you get more of them.

The Secret to Health

• The placebo effect is an example of the law of attraction in action. When a patient truly believes the tablet is a cure, he receives what the believes and is cured.
  
  
• "Focusing on perfect health" is something we can all do within ourselves, despite what may be happening on the outside.
  
  
• Laughter attracts joy, releases negativity, and leads to miraculous cures.
  
  
• Disease is held in the body by thought, by observation of the illness, and by the attention given to the illness. If you are feeling a little unwell, don't talk about it - unless you want more of it. If you listen to people talk about their illness, you add more energy to their illness. Instead, change the conversation to good things, and give powerful thoughts to seeing those people in health.
  
  
• Beliefs about aging are all in our minds, so release those thoughts from your consciousness. Focus on health and eternal youth.
  
  
• Do not listen to society's messages about diseases and aging. Negative messages do not serve you.

The Secret to Money

• To attract money, focus on wealth. It is impossible to bring more money into your life when you focus on the lack of it.
  
  
• It is helpful to use your imagination and make-believe you already have the money you want. Play games of having wealth and you will feel better about money; as you feel better about it, more will flow into your life.
  
  
• Feeling happy now is the fastest way to bring money into your life.
  
  
• Give money in order to bring more of it into your life. When you are generous with money and feel good about sharing it; you are saying, "I have plenty."
  
  
• Visualise checks in the mail.
  
  
• Tip the balance of your thoughts to wealth. Think wealth.

The Secret to the World

• What you resist, you attract, because you are powerfully focused on it with emotion. To change anything, go within and emit a new signal with your thoughts and feelings.
  
  
• You cannot help the world by focussing on the negative things. As you focus on the world's negative events, you not only add to them, but you also bring more negative things into your own life.
  
  
• Instead of focusing on the world's problems, give your attention and energy to trust, love, abundance, education and peace.
  
  
• We will never run out of good things because there's more than enough to go around for everyone. Life is meant to be abundant.
  
  
• You have the ability to tap into the unlimited supply through your thoughts and feelings and bring it into your experience.
  
  
• Praise and bless everything in the world, and you will dissolve negativity and discord and align yourself with the highest frequency - love.

The Secret to You

• Everything in energy. You are an energy magnet, so you electrically energise everything to you and electrically energise yourself to everything you want.
  
  
• You are a spiritual being. You are energy, and energy cannot be created or destroyed - if just changes form. Therefore, the pure essence of you has always been and always will be.
  
  
• The Universe emerges from thought. We are the creators not only of our own destiny but also of the Universe.
  
  
• An unlimited supply of ideas is available to you. All knowledge, discoveries, and inventions are in the Universal Mind as possibilities, waiting for the human mind to draw forth. You hold everything in your consciousness.
  
  
• We are all connected, and we are all One.
  
  
• Let go of difficulties from your past, cultural codes, and social beliefs. You are the only one who can create the life you deserve.
  
  
• A shortcut to manifesting your desires is to see what you want as absolute fact.
  
  
• Your power is in your thoughts, so stay aware. In other words, "Remember to remember".

The Secret to Life

• You get to fill the blackboard of your life with whatever you want.
  
  
• The only thing you need to do is feel good now.
  
  
• The more you use the power within you, the more power you will draw through you.
  
  
• We are in the midst of a glorious era. As we let go of limiting thoughts, we will experience humanity's true magnificence, in every area of creation.
  
  
• Do what you love. If you don't know what brings you joy, ask, "What is my joy?" As you commit to your joy, you will attract an avalanche of joyful things because you are radiating joy.
  
  
• Now that you have learned the knowledge of The Secret, what you do with it is up to you. Whatever you choose is right. The power is all yours.

-------------------------- end of excerpt ---------------------------

Lee and Ti

Six Moon Dance

From Six Moon Dance by Sheri Tepper

A certain mindfulness reminded: Do not say don't be silly. Say, instead, of course, I know, I understand. Do not go too softly. Go strongly, as one who is perilous and brave.
A certain mindfulness said: Do not smell of this world, but of the vast sea, the spaces between the stars.
A certain mindfulness said: do not dance as a woman would dance, as a man would dance, as legs would dance, but as wings would dance, as these two would dance if they were lovers making a promise that would echo among the galaxies.
Do not be bound by gravity, for we will swim weightless within this liquid world. Do not be bound by breath, for we need not breathe, or by thought, for we need not think. Here is only sensation and the need for joy.
We are such glorious stuff we need not carry pain around like a label. Our duty, as living things, is to be sure that pain is not our whole story, for we can choose to be otherwise....we can choose to dance.

Dont' you quit

------------ author unknown -------------

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
Whe he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

Don't Say You're Not Important

--------- author unknown ----------

It simply isn't true,
The fact that you were born,
Is proof, God has a plan for you.

The path may seem unclear right now,
But one day you will see,
That all that came before,
Was truly meant to be.

God wrote the book that is your life,
That's all you need to know.
Each day that you are living,
Was written long ago.

God only writes best sellers,
So be proud of who you are,
Your character is important,
In this book you are the Star.

Enjoy the novel as it reads,
It will stand throughout the ages,
Savor each chapter as you go,
Taking time to turn the pages.

My second skin

My house bathed in moonlight, rests,
silent and welcoming,
and I breathe love into its spaces.

It seems a reflection of me,
the way the furniture is arranged,
the chairs facing each other.

Do they talk among themselves, I wonder,
in the stillness of the night,
picking up bits of broken-off conversation?

Does the warm air twirling up the stairs,
or the slippers, discarded, under the bed,
remind it of us, when we are away.

Do the walls rejoice with the tinkle of laughter,
does the carpet hoard shards
of my shattered dreams.

Does it feel protective, caring,
shielding us from wind and rain,
silent witness to silent pain.

Content, replete, joyous,
I settle into its calm stillness,
and it wraps itself around me.

Let life in

On your way to work this morning, did you notice
the beggar child, eyes filled with tears,
face pinched by hardship?
Or your own beggar-heart
starved for love, for light.

In the din of traffic, did you hear
the lonely call of a solitary bird
perched high on a light-pole?
Or your soul's desperate plea
To sing its own song?

Juggling deadlines,
did you pause to consider,
that you too have an expiry date?
That, your life is waiting to be taken as a gift
and lived.

Does your smile reach your eyes,
does it reach the other's heart?
Are the windows of your eyes shut tight
with worry and distraction?
Does suspicion clog your heart-valves?

Is coffee the only thing that lifts you up,
or alcohol?
What about laughing child-eyes
or the lift and sweep of a soaring seagull?
or the joy that comes from within.

Is life passing you by,
while you
play out the various roles in a life not quite yours?
If life comes knocking,
are you busy in another existence?

It's time to let life in.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bliss

In the still, sacred space,

I feel the tread of angels,

the whisper of their wings,

their love, all-embracing.

My senses dim and fade,

my heart blooms in joy.

I lose myself in silence,

And wrap myself in bliss.

The light is all-dissolving,

love holds me in its thrall,

my soul lost in ecstasy,

Only bliss remains.

Wheel-watch

I am on a flight from Keri Keri to Auckland in a smallish aircraft and for the first time on any flight I'm sitting next to the wheel. It is one of those aircrafts where the wings run across the body on the top and so the body sits rather low and close to the wheels. As the plane taxies, I watch fascinated as the wheel rotates balanced on what seems to be a flimsy leg, and I feel like I'm in a giant mosquito, big body and paltry legs. The wheel however, does not think like this and therefore takes us up the runway, ever accelerating, and very soon it gets lifted off the ground and almost immediately a hatch opens up underneath the wing and the wheel still spinning gets folded up and neatly slips into it. Wow! The plane is now wheelless and airborne.

The scenery that unfolds under me is stunning. A veritable feast of green - fields pockmarked with sheep and cattle, neatly hedged, undulating hills shaded with hues only nature can paint. Dark splotches where the clouds cast shadows below. Rooftops among the fields, in red, brown or grey slate. Forests of dark pine which look so mysterious on the ground, look surprising demystified from the air. All this punctuated with blue, gleaming strips of tiny lakes, streams, rivers. After a while I can see the sea glimmering in the distance, the deep aquamarine shrouded in mist like a blue, shy secret. We then climb over the clouds and we are flying over these cushiony billowing masses of confectionary perfection.

As we near Auckland, we descend below the clouds again and the sea is directly below us now, or at least the bay is, gleaming blue-green and sparkling naughtily, almost beckoning me to join in and sink into the waters. In the distance a small strip of land shimmers hazily and all of a sudden the wheel hatch opens and the wheel descends. I look ahead into the distance and see no land. I wonder if the pilot is planning a sea-landing. But we don't need wheels for that, do we? I then can't help thinking how our lives are like that too. We fly over nothingness sometimes lost at sea and we look into the distance to get a grip of our bearings, to see if there is any land where we can park for a while, and panic sets in when we see none, entirely forgetting that our Pilot can see ahead and is steering our lovingly into dry and safe land. And then of course, the landing strip appears below us right out of the sea and the wheel fulfils its raison d'etre and makes contact with the hard land and wheels us safely to the airport.

A solitary, winter walk

It's interesting how walks pan out on cold, winter evenings. The temperature is 10C and a cold wind is blowing and within minutes of walking my body is as cold and stiff as a piece of frozen chicken. The wind wraps itself around my body and the cold seeps in through the four layers of clothing that I have on. But as I walk briskly, my circulation gets going and warms up my body and gently thaws me out. I then reach a stage when the warmth from within reaches the cold from without and pretty soon the cold is banished as my body surrounds itself with the warmth it has itself produced.

It always amazes me how quickly night falls in winter. When I start my walk the sky is a light blue and the moon has just risen and the white clouds are still streaked with pink, but within moments the light fades and the sky settles into an inky blueness in which the moon gleams like a round, beaming pearl. The only indication of the day departed is the halo of light which still shines in the west, a gentle, lingering farewell from the sun.

My nose catches whiffs of wood smoke that waft out from the chimneys. Bouquets of fragrances that indicate which wood is being burnt. Some sharply aromatic, some pungent and smoky but all delicious. I picture flames leaping up through the wood as it slowly crumbles into ash. And I cannot help wondering how even during the last leg of its journey from soil to ash the tree still gives us warmth and light. Can I be as selfless, I wonder, can I be as giving?

These are a few of my favourite songs ...

1. Mozart's Concerto No.21 - Andante, also known as the Elvira Madigan theme.




2. The Theme song from the movie 'Summer of 42'




3. Theme from 'Godfather' (Speak softly love)




4. How great thou art - Elvis Presley



5. Amazing Grace - Hayley Westentra

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.

T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares
I have already come;
'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far
and Grace will lead me home.

When we've been here ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise
Than when we've first begun.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.




6. Love me tender - Elvis Presley

Love me tender,
Love me sweet,
Never let me go.
You have made my life complete,
And I love you so.

Love me tender,
Love me true,
All my dreams fulfill.
For my darlin I love you,
And I always will.

Love me tender,
Love me long,
Take me to your heart.
For its there that I belong,
And well never part.

Love me tender,
Love me dear,
Tell me you are mine.
Ill be yours through all the years,
Till the end of time.

Just a thought ...

Do not give all of yourself to any one person or thing or activity or idea, you are too huge and immense to be held in another person's hands. Only life can hold you, only the universe can…...

Stillness .....

"To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders."

- Lao Tsu

Renunciation

It is hard to live the life of renunciation;
its challenges are difficult to find pleasant.
Yet it is also hard to live the householder's life;
there is pain when associating with those
among whom one feels no companionship.
To wander uncommitted is always going to be difficult;
why not renounce the deluded pursuit of pain?

Dhammapada verse 302

Longing

There's an odd sort of feeling
that rises in my heart,
unformed, unnamed, niggling,
that refuses to part.

I still my mind in silence
and stare at it for long.
Unmoving, it intesifies,
curious, I flow along.

Beneath, I find it lurks
my moments dark and fair.
And every step it dogs
their emptiness laying bare.

Joy, excitement, happiness,
I look at each in turn.
Fear, envy, hopelessness,
these I quickly spurn.

I see it then emerge,
a longing deep it is,
with my Creator to merge
and lose myself in Bliss.

Lesson time again

It's lesson time for me again, and the important ones I've learnt (or trying hard to learn) over the past few days are -

1. Your self-worth is never to depend on what someone else says/does, or does not say/do. If it does then you are simply giving away your power to someone else, it's like, it is your life but you are letting someone else pilot it. Take back the controls, look inside and find your worth on your own.

2. Let go of the past. Always. It is dead. If ghosts of it still keep appearing, then you've probably not achieved closure. Bring out the issues into the open, deal with them, resolve them and bury them. Period.

3. One close, deep relationship is more precious than a hundred shallow ones. Throw out the shallow ones, they take away too much of your time and energy and will probably not be around when times are bad. Nurture your close relationships. Lavish your love on the really meaningful ones. Let them bloom and grow.

4. Nurture yourself. If there is anyone in the universe most deserving of your love, it is you. So said Buddha. You cannot love others if you are feeling unloved or unlovable yourself. You cannot make the world a happy place if your inner life is in shambles. Nurture your inner self with kindness, compassion, love.

5. Your happiness or sorrow is entirely based upon the thoughts you have. You can change your attitude and be forever happy, but that happiness is still of the mind and belongs to the world. Bliss, on the other hand, comes from rising above the mind, it is neither happy nor sad, it is just a state of being in oneness.

6. Remember you are divine. Never lose an opportunity in all your quiet moments to remind yourself that. Slowly but surely the knowledge will seep in and wisdom will dawn. This will take you out of the drama of the world and put you in touch with joy and bliss. Then you can splash around in the world and still not get wet.

God Bless!

An autumnal song

On a watery, wintry sort of sky,
blue, benign, with blossoming clouds,
the sun hides, hesitates, appears,
and pale sunbeams on the grass lie.

Autumn's brush has splashed the trees
with the colours of a fire ablaze,
orange, yellow, red and gold, leaves
crisp, crinkly, on the grass, aflame.

A loving presence, a stillness deep,
joins me, lets me company keep.
I drop my burdens at His feet,
my fears on His bosom sleep.

And Nature in joyousness sings
the birds, the trees, the crooning wind,
and hill to hill with hymning fills,
my soul, the rhapsody joins in.

Crisis

I search for clues among the debris
of the scattered remnants of a crisis.
A stitch with which this heart to mend,
a light into raptures my soul to send.

Along the shores of a scattered mind,
and a heart now a desert wasteland,
a shining pearl I shall surely find,
among the forlorn driftwood on the sand.

The pain I hope has broken the shell
of ignorance, and will bring a swell,
a tide of wisdom so painfully won,
a desire to carefully darkness shun.

Will the light lift the veil and reveal
my soul, will it darkness' layers peel?
A dream, a passing dream it is,
this and every other crisis.

Why have you forsaken me, oh Lord?

Why in confusion does my mind part?
Why does fear vandalise my heart?
Will you not hear my plea, oh Lord?

I stand before your door, bereft,
My heart this pain has rent, cleft,
Will you not open unto me, oh Lord?

The solace of your arms I seek,
Lowly I stand before you, meek,
Will you not embrace me, oh Lord?

As hope slowly dims and fades,
And darkness in my soul pervades,
Have you forsaken me, oh Lord?

Love

Have you noticed that love takes you over all obstacles, makes light your burdens, strengthens your heart, lightens your step, brings out the joy in your soul, makes you realise you are Divine? Why then do we cling to your fears, most of them unfounded? Why do we abdicate a kingdom of love, a paradise of bliss for a poor substitute, a gloomy thorny desert of fear? How can we be the most evolved creation when we do not realise this? Is our Creator disappointed? Does he ardently desire that we return to His kingdom? Is he patiently waiting? Why don't we heed His call? Whose is the greater loss? His or ours? Now I know what my soul years for ......

Love...

Do everything with so much love in your heart
that you would never want to do it any other way.

- Yogi Desai

Little by little your heart grows up

'Lil Tia's latest poem -

Little by little your heart's power grows up
Like water in a golden clear cup
When you overcome fears you will
Make cheers and cheers but
The worst thing can happen sometimes
You might become a bad person who makes
Tricks and pranks and crimes
So don’t run off when you’re six or seven
you will understand your parents when you’re twelve and eleven.

Wellsprings of love

I have found that people usually say to me that I do well at everything I undertake. I did some thinking on that and realised that the reason behind it is that I do everything with a lot of love. The moment I do something less than whole-heartedly, the result is also less than satisfactory. It is said that our natural state is the state of love. When we strip away the thoughts, feelings and concepts that habitually occupy our mind space, all that is left is Love. But sometimes I lose that connection with my Inner Source, I lose connection with the wellspring of my being. And then from that state of darkness to come back into light is a struggle. So I decided to investigate what it is that nourishes that wellspring of Love within me that keeps me connected.

I find that meditation or being in the meditative state helps. As also spending time by myself in solitude. All of us are bundles of energy and we are constantly transmitting and receiving energy from others. Sometimes this energy can cause an overload on our system causing it to distort our own energy frequencies or maybe we could pick up negative impulses unknowingly or unwittingly. The time spent in solitude enables us to clear this energy overlap from others and recharge our batteries.

Have you noticed how Nature is always connected to the source? There is no falsehood, no ego, no malice or anger, Nature is constantly being itself, in all its pristine simplicity. Being in Nature somehow connects me to that simplicity of the universe, its orderliness and its love. All my masks, my pretensions, my barriers fall away and I am able to get in touch with the deep peace within me, to the simplicity and innocence.

There are moments in life when we experience something that takes us out of ourselves. Like listening to beautiful music, or being engaged in an activity that makes time stop, we lose our awareness of the past and the future and only the present remains, During those times we experience eternity, for being in the present is being in the eternal Now. We drop the concept of a limited time frame and experience the limitlessness of our being.

If you have spent time with babies (not as caretakers feeding, changing, bathing them :) but just being with them, you'll realise that babies are in a state of bliss. They look at the world with no preconceived notions, no learned responses, no fear or anger or unwarranted desire. Soon you begin to drop your fears, your agitation (which is always under the surface, no matter how calm a person you are :) your street-smartness, your constant alertness to danger and begin to reclaim that state of innocence that dwells within you always. When you are with a baby you cannot feel anything but love and joy, her innocence is so heart-breaking.

So it seems to me that to keep that well-spring of love within me brimming and overflowing, I need to seek those experiences that keep me connected with the Source.

Do you have your own list?

:)

The Matrix

------------------- excerpt from a Dreams Alive newsletter ---------------------

"Unplugging from the Matrix"

If you saw the move, "The Matrix", you understand how we can be unconsciously programmed without even knowing it. The central character named Neo at first isn't even aware of the illusion that he's been living. But when Morpheus shows him how he's been "going through the motions" - almost like a robot, itawakens Neo. At first Neo thinks he's powerful (the ego tries to take charge again) and he becomes disappointed in his newly discovered abilities.

But as Morpheus reminds him, it's all an illusion...
Neo is still in disbelief...

How could I have been fooled for so long? Why? How is it possible?

As Neo begins to awaken, he wonders, Is he the One?

The real question is, can he step back from the Matrix long enough to sense the illusion - and detach from it...

Once he detaches, he begins to re-discover his real power...His Essence.

So the question we can ask ourselves is:

Are we aware of the illusions we've allowed ourselves to believe?

Do they make us fall back again into the "psychic sleep" or do they help awaken us?

The Matrix is the false premise of "Something else controls me. I'm asleep. They're at the helm. I'm a victim. They take control. There's not enough..."

But at Source level - nothing can ever control you. There's more than enough for everyone.

As you begin to remember why you came here to this planet, and the lessons you've come to re-learn, what used to cause you stress and overwhelm will begin to energize and inspire you.

So smile, take a deep breath and realize… I Am Source...

And from that level - you are free…

In that moment, you've reconnected to the "I Am" Presence. You feel the One-ness and how everything in life is connected.

Life feels new again...

If money is a concern for you - the "Matrix" has a hold of you. Remember scarcity is an illusion - it's not real. Right now you have access to the same supply that each of us has - and that supply is Infinite. It's only the mind that's been conditioned to believe otherwise.

And you know you're not your mind - right?

To Your Dreams And To Your Abundance,

Paul Bauer http://www.dreamsalive.com/

--------------------------- end of excerpt -----------------------------

Sunlight sonata

The day dawns beautiful, the sun rises over the hills and pours its liquid light into the nooks and crannies and floods the valley. It's a blessed sight and a blessing to watch, sunlight crowning the tops of trees and falling quivering on the grass. Leaping and gleaming on the satin waves rippling down the river. Spotlighting the houses nestling on the sides of the hills in an orange glow, naughty rays glinting off windows caught off-guard. Falling warm on my face, my hands and through the windows of my eyes reaching my heart where it glows like a fiery diamond. What do you call it when the light without meets the light within?

And all through the day the liquid light flowing through my mind……

Surely we must be beings of light, else why would we respond so joyously to the sunlight, why would the moon rising on a dark sky send us into such raptures? Why would we love light so much that we flood our nighttimes with so much artificial light. Surely man among all his waking moments must at least in some luminous moment remember that he is a being of light. Else how futile would our life be, if we were to surround ourselves with light without and yet live in darkness within. Look at babies, look at their eyes, how full of light they are. There is no fear there, no darkness. And yet we say we are grown-up and all we have done is to lose sight of our own light. Why do we go seeking to solve the mysteries of the universe, to shed light on all the unsolved mysteries of the world when what we need to do is to delve within ourselves and reacquaint ourselves with our true selves. And find our light ……

Afternoon song

It is a great blessing that today is a holiday and the weather is perfect. The sun rises over the hills and floods the valley with a pale autumn sunlight. Towards afternoon after a late breakfast, I decide to spend some time in our garden. The sun is soft and warm on my face or back and it is cool in the shade. I clear the garden of weeds, dead leaves and twigs to the accompanying music of birdsong. The tui calls in its distinct double-noted song. And the wind gently serenades the tree-tops like a sweet violin accompaniment. The grass, the leaves, the soil is soft in my hands and the atmosphere is calm. But thoughts roil and rumble in my mind as I grapple with emotions. But after a while I have a moment of clarity.

I realize that my greatest weakness has been that I have never been aware of my own strength. It is true that in the past that I’ve had glimpses of it and it has come to my aid in times of difficulty. But as a constant everyday conviction, I do not think of myself as strong. I tend to look outside for external validation. But in that moment of clarity I realize that I am stronger than all my troubles, difficulties and obstacles. I am powerful beyond measure. This somehow seems to settle my thoughts and calm my emotions. Yes, I have great strength which is not of the ego, but is inherent in me as a quality of my inner self, and I possess great courage too. And yes, I must not allow myself to forget this :)

Amazing Grace

A song that never fails to move me to tears and uplift my spirits.
In Hayley Westentra's sweet voice .......



click here to listen

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares...
we have already come.
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...
and Grace will lead us home.

When we've been here ten thousand years...
bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise...
then when we've first begun.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

Tia'a Poem

Among all the people who called / wrote and wished me on my birthday, I also got a call from my brother who told me that his 8 year-old daughter has started writing poetry and that she had wriiten one that blew his mind. He sent it to me and, well, it blew me away too :)))

So, without much further ado, here's the 'lil button's poem -

Sometimes I think of things that don't have a chime
things that aren't real or dont have a rhyme.
Thoughts of things that are all imagination
things that are full of me and my full creation.
From time to time I make it rhyme
Whenever I hear a chime, I burst into tears
cause all the pasts I've been through will give me all those fears.
Now I am older, I understand I need to overcome those fears
and stop my big bursting tears,
My poem to follow for all my years.

Maps and other travel thoughts

Have you ever been in a situation where you are travelling somewhere and you realise you are lost? You go around and around going past the same streets again and again trying desperately to get your bearings, lost and confused, until you remember the map that you forgot to consult. Then you look at it, find your location, the areas around and everything falls into place. You can see your destination, all available routes and the best route to take to get there. An aerial view when you are down there on the ground lost, almost always brings clarity.

For the past few weeks, I have been scampering around like a rat lost in a maze desperately seeking routes to go forward. Signposts to tell me what to do, where to go. After I was well and truly lost among the maze of emotions, experiences and choices, down on the ground, the only way to go was up and so I decided to get an aerial view. In my case it is the soul's point of view, why I am here, what I am doing towards achieving that purpose. When I detach myself from the drama, intensity and immediacy of life, I am able to see my purpose, my way forward, the reasons for the experiences of my life more clearly. Looking at the larger picture clarifies my life and I am better able to choose the best possible route to get to my destination.

I have also realised that when you are a traveller you enjoy the ride, you don't get attached to the scenery. So too with life, why get attached to people, places, pleasant experiences?

And, in spite of our travelling companions, we always travel alone, my experiences and the lessons I have to learn are my own, my path can only be walked upon by me.

~~~

Thoughts on a partly sunny day

This morning I sit in the lounge with a hot cup of tea and gaze at the scene outside the French windows. It's been raining for the last two days, so the trees are looking invigoratingly greener and the birds are all chirping among the leaves. It is a mixed sort of day, as though the day cannot decide which way to go. The sky is full of clouds so the sunlight is hazy, but once in a while the clouds part and the light creeps up the balcony floor and in towards the carpet. The intensity of the sunlit pattern changes as the light goes from hazy to strong and back to vague again as the clouds move back and forth in the sky.

I cannot help thinking how similar our lives are. I think our soul is like the sun, bright and luminous, always there, always shining. And the clouds, they are our thoughts and resulting emotions, our experiences. White fluffy clouds for positive, happy thoughts. Grey, menacing clouds for dark, tumultuous emotions. And at any given moment of time, these clouds whether white or dark are always clouding the wisdom of our soul, blocking out its light. And we mistakenly think that life consists of clouds, as our gaze moves from white clouds to gray and back and forth, most of the time unaware of our sun-soul.

But if we were to be in a state of mindful awareness we could reach the state of 'sthithaprajna'. The Stithaprajna dwells always in the Spirit without giving way to grief, lust, fear and delusion. His vision beholds the Spirit everywhere. For that we have to rise above the clouds, high up there we can see the clouds for what they are, where they arise from and how transient they are. In that state we can see the luminance of the sun at all times.

Then there will be no cloudy days, only sunlit ones :) Then we can behold the Divine always.

~~~

Thoughts on a cloudy day

Come with me on a journey, let's do a small exercise together. If you are not near an open window, after you read this move to a window. If it's night wherever you are, no problem, just make small adjustments in your thinking :) now that's easy, isn't it?

Ok, now look out towards the sky. Hopefully, you will be able to see a patch of sky, blue, or grey or black or white with clouds. If there are clouds, watch them for a while, observe how they shift and move, sometimes imperceptibly, but move they do, they change shape, get fatter and denser or dissipate into wisps of mist. It is very calming and soothing. Watch them for a while. Notice their impermanence, their shifting, moving quality. Our troubles are like that, blocking out the sun, clouding our vision, sometimes getting fatter and more dense and engulfing us completely while we flap around like a drowning person, trying to find the light. But all we need to do is make a slight shift in our perspective and tell ourselves, 'this too will pass', this is 'annicca' like the Buddhists call it. This is impermanent. This will shift and move and pass away. If we remain calm and detached, troubles are like clouds, they swirl around us but eventually they move on.

If the clouds have passed, notice the sky, its colour. Blue. Scientists tell us that the colour is the result of the scattering of sunlight. I have noticed that the sunlight that you experience in places that are closer to the equator have a more yellow quality and the sunlight in places further away from the Equator is more blue-tinged. But how can that be? Pure light is white, so what explains the colour? Let's look at the concept of colour. Our eyes see everything around us as having some colour, or white or black. The names of the colours are labels that humans have given to colours to communicate better, for I do not think that honeybees say to themselves, "oh look! A RED flower!" Again science tells us that colours result when the light that strikes a surface reflects on to our eyes after the rest of the spectrum has been absorbed by the object. So when light falls on a plant, the plant absorbs all the rays of light except the green part which get picked up by our eyes. So colour just like shape, texture, solidity are just the perception of our senses.

Look at the blue sky more closely. It almost looks solid. Like an inverted blue bowl. Nothing else is visible unless the moon has risen during the day or you might see passing birds or planes. But we know that there is only air up there, it is not solid. Beyond the blueness, unseen by us, there are planets, stars, galaxies, supernovas. See them all in your mind's eye, stretched out to infinity, expand your consciousness outward to meet them, outwards in all directions. Feel the vastness within you, flowing out from you, feel the disappearance of boundaries. Your body is the experience of the senses, like colours, like solidity, feel it become light and unburdensome. There is nothing to fear at all, everything is light and love in the Universe, feel the lightness and the love. Unhindered by the senses, feel the oneness with all creation. This is our natural state.

And yes, things are not what they appear to be. It's all a matter of perception and you can alter your reality by changing your perspective.

~~~

The opaque mirror

Today in the office, I take a break from work, close my eyes and sink into my myself. An image of a mirror with a beautiful wrought iron border surfaces. I look at it fascinated, admire the oval shape, the sheen of the glass, the fine working of the metal. And yet, in spite of all my looking I cannot see myself in the mirror. And then the realisation dawns that I am that mirror.

Over the years, a layer of experiences, thoughts, impressions, opinions have collected over the gleaming surface to such an extent that the mirror no longer reflects anything. All I am seeing all the time is the grime that has accumulated on top. Only if I peel away the layers one by one, throw away the scum of dead thought and clean it all up with the laser beam of mindful awareness will I be able to get to the gleaming mirror that is me. My true self. The pure light of consciousness. The unblemished manifestation of divinity. Pure love. It is all there, always there, waiting to be discovered, to be reclaimed, to be brought to light again.

That is the highest purpose of my life.

Chrysalis

The other day I was walking in my front yard, where the grass had grown tall and was interspersed with tiny yellow wildflowers. I noticed a tiny little butterfly alight on one of these flowers. It sat there, light and airy, probing around for nectar when the wind began to blow. Hard. So hard that the flower stalks bent down and the flowers almost touched the ground. I expected the butterfly to get blown off, such a light-looking creature it was. But to my great astonishment, the butterfly stayed on the flower, clinging tightly, even as the flower swayed madly in the wind, tossed here and there. Even as the wind beat on my face and flapped my clothes. I wondered about the strength of the butterfly then, such strong legs it must have to hold fast to that dainty flower in the force of what might have been a strong breeze to me, but which was evidently quite forceful for the grass and the flowers.

I wondered then where this strength came from. Until I remembered the chrysalis. Inside the chrysalis the young butterfly goes through a period of growth. But when the time comes for it to emerge, it has to struggle to break open the walls of the chrysalis. What has been a protective cocoon so far is now restrictive. So it struggles, its efforts pushing the fluid into the wing veins so that they can open up. Its legs and mouth probably straining against the chrysalis walls, tearing them open. Until the butterfly emerges, light and strong.

It seems to me that my struggles have also been like that. Maybe this struggle and pain was necessary for me to break open the walls of my chrysalis and to emerge as a butterfly. Maybe it will give my wings lightness and my legs strength. Maybe it will also give my heart the wisdom to learn to let go of the past, just as the butterfly discards and forgets the chrysalis as it flies away into freedom.


                    \      /
                      \  /
                       O

A violet vision in a dying day

As I go on my walk I see many flowering bushes, pink roses, spotted tiger lilies, delicately pretty pohutukawas, but today I see a vision that takes my breath away. A bush full of violet flowers, large velvet-petaled and stamens that bend into forks at right angles. The flowers hover like a violet cloud over the bush and even the ground underneath is made beautiful by the fallen violet petals among the autumn leaves.

The autumnal leaves look lovely everywhere, yellow-orange and crinkled, sprinkling the green grass in a violent contrast, on footpaths and huddling on the edges of gutters where the water gleams pink from the clouds above. I walk to the river where the heavy rain has transformed it into a rushing current. The blue waters speckled pink rush merrily along, rippled and foaming, carrying logs and leaves. But for the sound of the river everything else is still as the day dies.

The sun has set in the distant sea but its rays still linger in the sky in a reluctant farewell. The pink in the sky turns deeper into peach and then into a vivid rose as the interspersed clouds turn a deep shade of grey. The trees silhouetted on the horizon turn a dark shade of green. I wonder if we can be like a sunlit day, spread light and warmth while alive and be so gloriously alive in our dying moments that even they sparkle with joy and beauty.

As I walk alongside the stream the song of the flow mingles with the muted music of the birds in the trees. Dusk approaches rapidly and lights come on on the hills among the tiled roofs and the treetops. This is my favourite part of the day. It is as if the day is parting but with the promise that it will be back soon. Somehow there is always hope in the departing light.

As I near the house, night has fallen and the trees appear mysterious among the shadows. If the clouds clear away, soon the stars will be out and hopefully a laughing crescent moon. Everything is so perfect in nature, so effortless, so simple and so beautiful. If only we could learn to live like that.

The silence of night

I was standing outside on the balcony yesterday, in the dark of the night and it occurred to me that the night has a different kind of silence. It is the silence of the stars and the horizon lit up with pale moonlight and the quiet stillness of trees ruffled by the faintest of breezes, and into this silence falls the faint sound of an insect buzzing, and the soft occasional tinkle of the wind chime like a gentle pluck on a sitar string and this dark silence accentuated by the coolness of the night laden with the promise of rain. How can I help but lose myself ?

Before I go to bed I go and stand in the balcony once more. This time the breeze wasn't blowing, so the trees were still and the wind chime was quiet. So the silence was deeper. But there was another beautiful sound. A lone owl was calling in the hills. 'Koo-koo' it called lustily. I read somewhere that the owl calls for a mate, therefore the sound was at once melancholy and hopeful. Hope must spring eternal in the owl's breast for sometimes I do hear an answering owl call. When two owls call in unison, the sound is so beautiful I stop still and listen. 'Koo-koo' one calls and 'koo-koo' another answers in a slightly different pitch. I wonder then that owls must pack a lot of meaning into those two syllables, they must be saying all that they have to say in varying pitches and tones. Who knows, maybe they even make themselves understood. And look at us humans, so many syllables in so many languages and so little understanding of each other, so little understanding even of ourselves. The moon is high in the sky now and so the starlight is a bit dimmed. I stand in the moonlight and bask in it and feel blessed.

Later on in the dead of night, I wake up. The silence is deepest now, even though the darkness is not. There is a tiny sliver of moonlight that escapes through a parting in the curtain and gives the room a tiny glow. And in the deep silence only a humming is heard, which could be the journey of blood in my ears. I feel tempted to remain awake and listen to the silence, but sleep overtakes me.

Zzzzzzz...............

The cycle of life

One moment an insect is sitting on a branch and the next instant a bird eats it up. The insect’s life force is dramatically and instantly transformed into the bird’s. An earthworm crawls on the footpath and is trodden by a foot. This time the transformation is slower and subtler, as it turns into dust and seeps into the earth to be transformed into grass, trees, and fruits. In nature, every instant is one of transformation, of creation-destruction-creation. Only the form changes, but the essence remains the same. Watching this we accept it calmly and tranquilly as the cycle of life.

Yet when it is the turn of someone loved and close to us to die, we put up the greatest resistance to this fundamental truth, we react dramatically with grief, we withdraw into denial, so strongly do we hold on to the illusion of life. The same also happens with relationships to people, places, and jobs. Even if we know that it is time to move on, that the purpose of a relationship is over, even if it brings more pain than comfort, so attached are we to the familiar, so unwilling are we of getting out of our comfort zone, so afraid are we of facing the unknown that we cling on. Letting go is the hardest thing to do and yet it is the one thing that can truly liberate us, free us to be ourselves, help us find out true selves.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain

It's Good Friday everyday

Today is Good Friday and instead of going to church I am sitting at home blogging. If someone asks me now why I am not in church mourning the death of Christ, I would say that Christ died once 2000 years ago and that was enough, I don't have any plans to finish him off every year, year after year. Besides, I feel him alive within me, so what is there to mourn? Shouldn't I be jubilant and celebrate?

Come to think of it, I haven't even understood why his death is being remembered. It is said that Christ died to save us from damnation. Really? What damnation? At whose hands? Surely not at the hands of an all-loving, benevolent Divine Being who has nothing but love for us. Would any parent send their child to eternal damnation? If we as humans can be accomodating of our children's misdeeds, would not God be too?

It is also said that Christ took all our sins on Himself. But how? How is it possible that we sin and he gets punished? Does that mean then we can merrily go on sinning since he has already paid the price in a one-time horrifying instalment? Somehow this sin-transference theory does not hold much water with me.

Then it is said that he died and was resurrected on the third day. Cool. I don't have any problems with that. But if that's the case, he is still alive, right? Having conquered death. Then why are we putting him up on the Cross in elaborate ceremonies and mummifying him in black robes and burying him in vaults? Hmmm....

Jesus was a human being just like any one of us, but what took him out of the ordinary into the realm of the sublime was that he was able to realise his divine nature. For me the purpose of Jesus' life was to show to us that we too are capable of that. He walked on Earth to show us that we are all Christs-in-the-making. Every instant in which I am aware of my divine nature and connected to the divine being, I am being Christ. But all those moments where I lose that connection and wallow in darkness, I am being merely human, that is my sin. And so in my life Jesus dies and is born again every day. Every day is a Good Friday and Christ is resurrected and Easter comes as soon as I realise that I have forgotten my soul and it has gone into mourning. The only evil is to be in that state of darkness, disconnected from the divine source and the only good is getting back into Christ-consciousness. We do not honour Christ by remembering Him on Good Friday or Easter or during Sunday services, we honour Him by being Him.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

dancing stars and lunchtime ramblings

Last night on TV on 'Dancing with the Stars' I watched Cory the boxer dancing the fox-trot with Nerida the dancer after being coached by her for a week. After the dance one of the judges made a comment that made me think. She said 'Cory, you need to bring out your feminine side especially in a dance like the foxtrot. There can never be any doubt in our mind that you are a man, so don't hold on to that image so firmly, give expression to your feminine side as well, your soft, elegant side'. Hmmmm… that made me think. How true! How we all struggle so valiantly to put on a brave masculine front, including us women. 'Be brave, be a man', growing, little boys are told as tears well up in their eyes, as if giving vent to their feelings is some crime. And look at us modern women, staunchly and stoically we march, mistakenly thinking that by doing so we are being as strong as men and will somehow be considered equal. Why is giving expression to one's feminine side considered weak? How can softness, gentleness, compassion, giving, expressing one's feelings be a flaw?

While I was going to get lunch today, I happened to run into John, an old friend. When he saw me his face lit up, and I suspect mine lit up too. Some spark was lit, a smile came to my face and if he wasn't rushing to a meeting I would probably have got a hug. And walking down the road under the drab, dreary autumn sky feeling lit up from within, I cannot help thinking how we touch people's lives. Even in the smallest most inconsequential meetings, lives are touched and we are transformed in an instant, if only by a fraction, but transformed we most definitely are.

As I continue walking, I see glimpses of beauty in the commonplace -

Slanting hazel eyes, soft with love.

Naughty, laughing youngsters with not a care in the world, the world at their feet.

Trees happily waving their green-turning-to-yellow branches at the autumn sky.

The sun surprising us with a split-second visit.

Liquid elegance in a Swarovski shop window, crystal tamed into the most astonishingly beautiful shapes.

Elegant curlicues on the facades of old buildings.

And under it all the heart of the city, softly beating, beneath the apparent chaos, in understated harmony.

The black, sequinned veil

One night I was sitting in my backyard looking up at the night sky which had obligingly decked herself up very liberally with stars. The Milky Way cut a hazy swathe through these bright glittering jewels and it seemed as though the night was a black, sequined veil spread across the sky.

But as I kept looking up at this fabulous fabric, a shift started taking place in my mind. The tapestry on the sky started to get hazy and dissolve and each star stood out in solitary splendour as I realised that even though stars appear next to each other, they might be millions of light years away in actual space, and so the sky which seemed two-dimensional until then now seemed to stretch out to infinity, and all of a sudden in a flash of insight and a rush of joy, I realised that I was looking up at the universe.

The whole universe was out there, swirling galaxies and twirling supernovas, stars dying and collapsing and new ones being born, hurtling meteors and slow-moving planets. Suddenly the placid, calm night sky became a crackling cauldron of movement, creation and destruction. And then all thoughts dissolved in my mind and I was left gaping in a state of awe and wonder. After that the sky was no longer the limit because there is no sky and no limit, just the limitless Universe.

Who am I?

The other day it occurred to me that whatever the circumstances of my life, poor / rich, healthy / sick, full social life / solitary, happy / sad, the only and greatest treasure in my life is myself. All these other circumstances are external, they pass away or change but I, I remain. Then I began to wonder what that 'I' is. Who am I? I realised that this self-conception changes from day to day or even from hour to hour. Then who is the real I?

Then a flash of insight told me that I am pure potential. What I see of myself is the manifested form. That which I choose to express of my potentiality. In unmanifested form I can be anything and everything, but what I have become is the result of my choices from moment to moment. At any given moment I chose to be sad, joyous, envious, forgiving, fearful and that is what I become. Some of our choices become habit. In the past, unknowingly some kind of situation must have triggered fear in our minds and slowly over time we become habituated to choosing fear in similar situations. What is also unknown to us is that we have a choice every time. Out of our pure potential we have the ability to chose courage, we have the strength to confront our fears.

I have also realised that if I remain aware of my potentiality it gives me power, because now I know that I have choices and I have the power to choose, instead of succumbing powerlessly and choicelessly. Now when I am beginning to feel fear, I can choose courage instead, instead of pain I can choose joy, instead of hate I can choose love. All of them exist in me as what I potentially am , but what I become is the result of my choices.

The light of insight does dispel darkness :)

~~~

Musings on a rain drenched walk

It is late evening and I am taking a walk when it starts to rain suddenly. First in a light smitter-smatter and then in a heavy drizzle. I have no raincoat or umbrella so I let myself get drenched. The raindrops caress my face in gentle strokes and slither down my nose and chin in large drops. And when I look up, in the bowl of the valley among the backdrop of the hills, there it is, a rainbow, a perfect arc, stretching from base of hill to base of another hill. Stark in the vividness of its colour and radiant in its beauty. As I walk, it fades slowly and disappears altogether. Then just as suddenly the rain stops, as if its only purpose had been to paint a rainbow in the sky.

Then it strikes me how effortlessly Nature does things. Without seeming to put in any effort it conjures up a rainbow from thin air. No stress, no striving, no deadlines, no bottomlines, just effortless ease. Just the intention and then the manifestation.

After the rain, the asphalt road has turned a shiny shade of black and the foliage, ah! they have turned a cleaner, crisper shade of green. Moisture hangs in the air like a secret and as I pass by trees, they give off a woody fragrance that mingles with the smell of the damp earth as shadows gather among the leaves and the sun bids a smiling farewell.

My dear Chirrikkuduka :D

Dearest Rajam,

Do you realise it is exactly twenty years since we first met in the corridors of NITIE. I don't know what you gained from that course but I not only did I gain a diploma and a fresh start to a new career but I also met you and you have remained one of my most cherished friends throughout these years. It must have been our individual pain at that time that brought us together and our determination to overcome it that took us to all sorts of unusual places. Do you remember the fair we went to in Matunga and how we tried our hands at almost all the games there. We were like two teenage girls, giggling all the time and eating pink candy floss. I hadn't done that since I was a kid. I don't giggle so much these days my dear, but I'm sure you still do.

I have come a long way since then, geographically at least :))) I'm not sure about my mental and spiritual development but I like to think that suffering and joy have both contributed to my growth. However, I must admit there are still some days on which I feel like a lonely, insecure teenager.

I remember we used to talk for hours, you did all the talking and I did the listening and even though you still complain about my lack of words, I think we should do what we are best at doing. So I will continue to listen, my dear, because it gives me immense pleasure to hear you talk and even more to hear you laugh. I don't know at what point of time you took up residence in my heart but you have lived there ever since. Even though when you went away to Belgium I had thought that our friendship was over.

You probably think that I have reached some high state of spiritual development, but, my dear, my days are as normal as yours. I stumble often and fall just like everyone does. But it is true there are times when I can reach the stillness within and then the dross falls away and only pure light of consciousness remains. Once you have experienced that joy then the pleasures of the world are not worth desiring even, but the senses are so clever they insidiously draw you back and so like everyone else I wallow in the world.

My dear Rajam, as you go about your life please know that my love is with you from moment to moment. And if in a moment of quiet, my thought brings a smile on your face, just think that I have been richly rewarded :) And, my dear, also know that your love for me has been like a golden shimmering thread that runs through the tapestry of my life.

With deepest affection,

:D

A River Soliloquy

I sit by the riverbank watching the river flow. It has a tempo of its own, it flows to the rhythm of nature, the beat of the earth and slowly I relax to match its tempo. My breathing slows down, my body loses its rigidly-held tensions and it feels as though the weight of my burdens fall off and flow away with the waters.

There are fallen logs rotting in the water on the edge, green with moss and coming apart slowly. Looking at them I realize how things come full circle, the cycle of life and death as things return unresistingly to the source. How different is man, how we cling to this transitory life, this false permanence.

Sometimes ducks come out to feed, foraging in the shallow waters. Also black swans, gliding like black clouds over the blue surface, their gait unhurried, their necks graceful. A duck with ducklings joins in sometimes, the babies, balls of fluff frantically following their mother around. Love wells up inside me, and breaking the barriers of my heart it flows towards the little family, embracing them in protection. But occasionally, the duckling number dwindles and I guess the mother learns to let go without attachment.

The river is mostly flowing, the current creating a dancing, rippling surface and a quiet music, but after a heavy rain, the river is muddy and full-bodied and rushing towards the sea. But even in the speed there is calmness beneath. And on some days, the waters are totally unmoving, or seems to be. Then the surface is like a glass lake. The trees on the banks peer at their own reflection even as I do, white clouds glide on the still surface and birds flap their wings and swoop without creating even a ripple. Things are not as they seem, the river seems to say. Be aware of the illusion of things.

a workplace litany

beneath the hum of the air-conditioning
i hear a lone cicada singing.
a strange out-of-place voice
among the honey-comb-office noise.
then just as quickly it fades
as bustle and clamour pervades.

then, in a moment of quiet,
arching, it rises to a height,
a simple, soul-stirring symphony,
a lilting, light-hearted litany.
the most precious things of all,
they speak silently to the soul.

* ** *** **** ***** **** *** ** *

Truth ?

A dear friend and I were having this discussion about Truth, and he kept saying, ‘I want to find out the truth, go deep into things and find it’. And I was wondering, what truth? where is he going to find it? Is truth so limited that it can be grasped by the mind?

When I am in deep meditation, I dissolve into nothingness. There is nothing left, not even the presence of spirit. Even the word ‘nothingness’ is inadequate to describe that state. That is the closest I have got to Truth.

In my opinion, everything else are beliefs, concepts, ideas, that we hold individually or together consensually. They are signposts, illuminations, guidelines, maps to help us navigate through the mine-filled labyrinth of life. But sometimes we espouse them so passionately, make them so inextricably our own that we are sometimes willing to even kill or die for our truths. We condemn and hate and live in fear on account of these truths. We allow these to blind us so completely that we seldom realize or are even aware of the luminous light that is our natural state.

But I guess my friend was looking for answers to questions, for light on issues that needed illumination. I hope he finds them.

An old Tamil song plays....

A haunting Malayalam number from the movie 'Manichitratazhu'


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