Grace

Every morning when I drive through the hills I thank God for bringing me here. The hills look different everyday, either the light quality is different, or it has rained or the mist is sitting at the foothills and I am driving through clouds. The sheep and cows grazing and the horses tossing their manes is such a beautiful sight. So today instead of just thanking Him I decided to make a list. The drive is usually smooth, I drive at 100K throughout and have to slow down only if there is traffic. I thanked Him for the smooth roads, the condition of the car, for the feeling of flight I have when the car goes smoothly downhill, the sudden turns and the breathtaking beauty each bend brings. I thanked Him for the freshness of the air and the clean water. I thanked Him for little things, if I get into a bus I will most likely get a seat, and a train too. A train ride to Wellington ensures some great landscape watching. I thanked Him for the ease with which affairs can be conducted here, u don’t have to watch your back all the time. I thanked Him for friends who always come to help and for the opportunities He provided for helping them too, for there is grace in receiving too. I thanked Him for my job and that I have one and for the support my workmates provide. By this time I had reached office so I had to stop but I could have gone on and on. But it was great to start the day in such a state of gratefulness and grace, that a smile comes easily to the lips.

Dark, mysterious night

Last night I was driving home in the dark, in the warm cocoon of the car, the darkness soft and enveloping, the streetlights throwing harsh puddles of light. I could feel the presence of the river flowing besides, dark-bodied and mysterious. The roads though familiar felt like they carried a secret and beckoned me to find out. Houses looked warm and comforting. I felt like driving on and on through the delectable, mysterious night.

Helen Keller

One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.

- Helen Keller

Silver night

I sit on a still night under the eucalyptus tree looking up at the sky through its branches. Stars beckon. Furry clouds are spread across the sky and the thin sliver of the moon fails to knife through them. Leaves rustle softly and insects make little chirping noises. A bird lulled to sleep by the murmuring brook wakes up and warbles its appreciation. A soft darkness gathers but the grass is still eerily lit by the cloudlight. The silence is silvery and the peace is deep.

Don't lose yourself

Sometimes it so happens that some thing posesses us completely, it could be a person, a career, an activity, so much so that we derive our sense of ourself from that thing. And when that external stimulus is withdrawn, our sense of self is fractured, broken. Always remember that we are whole and complete in ourselves. So don't lose yourself in something external to you.

The blossoming spirit

This morning after getting up I decided to meditate for a while. While meditating I had this feeling that I sometimes get that I am in the prescence of God. My spirit just blossomed and I felt like I was surrounded by this overwhelming love and a corresponding love rose within me. I kept feeling 'I love you God' and I was so happy I started crying just like in the poem. Then I said 'Can I kiss you God?' And she said, 'You will have to kiss the whole universe of just kiss something that is nearby, for I am in everything". There was such beauty and such peace. I felt like the Seagul felt when it has risen over all the clouds and looked down at the others huddled against the rain. All my pain, envy, desires just vanished. It was such an incredibly blissful experience. It is hard to describe. I felt my clarity returning and felt centered again.

Moonlight thoughts

Someone asks me "What did you do yesterday?" And I say "Ask not what I did, ask what I experienced." I might have done a lot of things and experienced very little, but I might have done very little but experienced a lot. Like a few moments ago, standing outside and watching the full moon glide effortlessly through the clouds, I experience peace, joy and the feeling that all is well and everything will turn out right. My spirit responds to the call of nature and I feel one with it.

mujhe le chal kaheen

tu bin bataye mujhe le chal kaheen
jahan tu muskuraye meri manzil wahin

meethi lagi, chakh ke dekhi abhi
mishri ki dali, zindagi ho chali
jahan hain teri baahein mera sahil wahin

mann ki gali tu phuharoon si aa
bheeg jaye mere khwabon ka kafila
jise tu gungunaye meri dhun hai wahin

Seashells

I collect moments like a child collects shells on the seashore.

Some of them many hue-ed and many-splendoured.
Sparkling with laughter, ribbed with love.

Some brown and heavy, sand-filled with tedium.

And yet others bleached white
with searing, arcing pain,
all colour wiped clean by misery.

And then the bits of shells,
broken moments that fell off before completion.

I collect moments like a child collects shells on the seashore
and weave them into the tapestry of life.

A special friend

That certain special way of yours
the thoughtful things you do
the way that I can be myself
whenever I am with you
these make you a special friend
i can't begin to say
how much I wish you happiness
today and everyday

(this poem was on a card I received on my birthday)

Rainsong

I hugged my pain again.
Again and again.
It threatened to break out
like raindrops in a rain cloud.
On the verge of the monsoon.
Finally it broke free.
In torrents.
Wave upon wave.
And yet the Earth broke out in laughter.
In perfume-scented song.
The air washed clean of the dust of the past.
Calm now and stillness.
And into this blessed silence,
the song-bird dropped note upon golden note,
of joy. Of hope, of gratefulness.
How odd that pain and joy always walk hand in hand.

The beginning

In the beginning was only the breath,
nascent, tremulous,
uncertain of its own power.
It blew a little, a leaf stirred,
it drew back surprised at its own strength.
"Let me try again".
Blew long and hard this time.
A branch shook.
Shock, hint of a smile.
"Maybe I can do it".
Maybe not.
Maybe, yes, just maybe...

A deep breath, long shuddering gust.
The tree waved its arms
and then its neighbour did
and then the next one.
Deep breaths,
gathering strength and storm.
Soon the whole forest is in frenzy.
The breath rises high above,
glee, elation, confidence,
points its finger at the sky.
Lightening scisorrs the heavens,
thunder claps its appreciation.
Yes, there is lightening in us,
and thunder,
and we possess
the strength to move mountains.