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Saturday, November 28, 2009

Notes to myself

There is no such thing as a bad decision or a wrong choice. We call it bad because the outcome was not what we expected. We made that choice sub-consciously because of the lessons that choice would bring that we were supposed to learn. In such a situation it helps to step back and ask oneself “what am I supposed to learn here?” If we don’t learn the lesson we tend to make the same choices and attract the same kind of situation again and again. Until we have learnt the lesson.

In a social gathering, you’ll find that almost all those present wear masks, including yourself. So the interaction is really between masks, seemingly friendly, happy and enjoyable. Saying things that sound pleasant, smiling to hide the pain or anger or dislike. How can such a situation be anything but false, disconcerting and dishonest?

Competition springs from the ego. Recognition from peers, glory, acknowledgement from society, my true self has no need of these. There is no need for comparing, competing or proving myself. If I am the source AND the manifestation, of what need is praise? Who is praising whom? If I am all and one, with whom do I compete? My true self knows only union, only the ego seeks to separate, compare and compete.

To be free of the need to talk, to communicate, to be sociable is for me a very liberating experience. Contact with civilisation can sometimes be a corrupting influence wherein while donning the mask of civilisation we lose touch with the purity of our true self. Doing this for too long brings about a disconnect with who we really are while we play the roles of who society wants us to be.

Nowadays I feel happy when I hear that someone has passed away. For the soul the earthly existence is a very binding one, bound by body, limited by time and space. It has taken on a earthly form for some reason, maybe for an experience or a lesson. Maybe it seeks realisation. It longs for escape from the trap of illusion, it longs to be free again. Death of the body and mind gives it that freedom, to merge with limitlessness once again. Why would it want to be trapped in ignorance, in darkness, when it can be the light it truly is and be one with infinite effulgence.

1 comment:

  1. So true, dear Allahdeen. You are the liberated One. But isnt the desire to be free itself a desire, nevertheless? And like any desire, if not fulfilled, isnt it bound to create a sense of lacking? To be and yet not to be in it all is, I suppose, the key. We exist, true, yet there is more to this existence than what we are able to perceive. Isnt denial of a state a form of attachment? The Buddha remains unaffected by all that is and all that is not.

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